The Power of Mindful Sex

This is because intimacy isn’t just physical. Whether we’re experiencing pleasure solo or with others, our thoughts and emotions can deeply influence the moment. For example, if you’re facing significant stress at work, you may find that you become easily distracted with thoughts of upcoming meetings and deadlines during sex...topics that aren't likely to inspire passion. Or perhaps intimacy has become an experience you put on auto-pilot; going through the motions and allowing your mind to wander may feel comfortable, but it can also impact your pleasure.

This is where mindfulness comes in. By bringing yourself back to the present moment, you can enjoy every sexual sensation to the fullest. 

A simple way you can begin to unlock mindful sex is by practicing mindfulness throughout your day. For instance, while standing in line at the grocery store you could make an effort to observe the colors of your vegetables, the sound of the store’s music, and the weight of the basket in your hands. Like cooking, painting, or playing tennis, mindfulness is something you can get better at with practice, and developing this skill during the day will make it easier to draw on it in the bedroom. 

And if you do find your thoughts drifting elsewhere during moments of intimacy, be gentle with yourself. It's perfectly normal for your mind to wander. Simply drop your thought and focus on the sensations of the current moment. If this is too difficult, you can also try replacing your thoughts with sensual ones. While using your erotic imagination isn't quite the same as mindfulness, this tip can help bridge the gap until you don't need to rely on it anymore.

Another way you can practice mindfulness throughout your day and during times of intimacy is through meditation. Whether you try an immersive sound bath or guided breathwork session, any type of meditation can help foster a healthy sex life by reducing stress and promoting better sleep (leaving you with more energy for sexual connection!). However, you can also try a dedicated meditation for deeper connection. For example, you could sit back-to-back with your partner and do a full-body scan together. As you bring awareness from your head to your toes, pay special attention to the points of contact between you and your partner, noticing the temperature of their body against yours and feeling of skin or fabric making contact. A meditation like this can ground you in the moment and leave you feeling even more in the mood!